Coffee time - Fellas, lets talk

For the fellas : Do you recognize abuse?

AB2#Image courtesy of Google

The other day my colleagues & I were discussing a few people that have come & gone in the company. Among them, one guy called Timothy was discussed in great length. A good guy who was really good at his work but mostly kept to himself. We praised him for how dedicated he was & wondered how he was doing. We also wondered if he was still…with her.

I’ll admit that at first I thought Timothy was arrogant. He would come to the office & not greet me good morning or even respond when I did. At times, he’d just give a slight nod & he would continue talking on the phone. Gosh that phone was always stuck to his hand, it was almost like another organ that grew there. I only realized later that he did not greet or talk to any woman in the office, just a slight nod & keep a distance. He would only talk to men & even then, not so much. The funny thing is whenever he had something to discuss with a female colleague, he would send chats through our office messenger or send emails. I was sitting RIGHT NEXT to him & he would still send me a chat to ask something. I found him ridiculous!

ab4Image courtesy of Google

That was until I saw her come in one day. She came to me, not even a Hello & with a distinct authoritative voice asked to see Timothy who was at the back office. I called for him over the extension & I don’t even know how this guy reached where she was! Like, before I could put the phone down, he bolted right to her! She looked annoyed with him, but I learned later that’s just how she always is. They stood in the corner & spoke in hush tones, later they stepped out to continue. When he came back in later, he looked..worried.

I didn’t think much of it then until things started to get weird. Everyday Timothy would be on the phone & right outside our office, we have a food court where we can see the people. I saw her sitting there, talking on the phone & sipping on her coca cola as she stared at him intensely. And not only was she watching him, she’d watch any woman that came close to him. It was so clear he was never comfortable talking to a woman when his chick was watching him.

Then came the times where he’d get video calls at random hours from her. I could faintly hear her demanding to know what he was doing & who he was with, even though it was clear he was in the office. I mean, she could just see it! There was even a time I had to call him while he was out on the field, it was in regards to work & I had to ask him something urgently. He spoke as though he was rushing me off the phone which was really rude until I heard her at the back. Later, he came to me & told me never to call him while he was out. I responded I had an urgent issue to raise & that’s why I did. He still insisted I should never call him & whatever it was, it could be sorted when he got back. I noted this. The message was signed, sealed & delivered. This did not come from him, but from her.

Timothy claimed to be married to her. But we did not believe that. What married woman would act like this? Why was she so insecure with where he was or what he was doing? Why would she always want to be around him, did she not have to be at home or work? She was constantly checking up on him, disrupting his work, his time. She was always so angry when she’d come see him in the office until he had to stop what he was doing to go talk to her outside. I had passed them at the hallway a few times & from what I had seen, he was always begging her for something or the other. While she coldly looked away, clearly enjoying how he lowered himself for her. Loving how someone is begging to be in her life. How desperate he’d be without her.

AB1Image courtesy of Google

Fellas, there is no way such a relationship is healthy. Maybe you’ll say he’s happy like this but I highly doubt. If a woman threatens you on the daily that she will leave you, isn’t that stress? A woman should want to make a relationship work with you. Why would she want to bolt out just because she feels insecure? You also cannot avoid interacting with other women at work or school just to make her feel secure, because she just never will. No matter how many women you avoid, she will never be alright. She will start to make up her own stories in her head about how you are being unfaithful. No matter how many passwords, pin codes or pics/videos you share with her. It will never ever be enough if she has put it in her head that she doesn’t trust you.

I remember a day Timothy called me out of the office & I found her there. I immediately had a weird feeling cause this chick never said hi to me, so what could she want? Timothy introduced us, which was hella funny cause I’ve seen her for months! Just to tell me she was his wife. I smiled at her & said it was a pleasure to meet her. We were pretending, right? His wife didn’t even look at me. She fixed her usual angry glare at him & completely ignored my existence. I turned to Timothy & I’m not lying, the guy was literally shaking! He stammered “You..er..you added me on linkedin..she..she doesn’t like it” In my defense, I didn’t remember adding him but if I did, why couldn’t he decline & it would be the end of the story, right? I wanted to say this but seeing the situation, I felt it would be in my best interest not to. Well, mostly his best interest cause the way she was staring daggers at him was quite bad. I turned to her, gave her a smile & told her I was sorry & did not realize it would be a problem. I told her that Timothy was a colleague & linkedin was only to connect to people you can work with. But from the way she didn’t respond to me, I knew my words fell on deaf ears. Then without looking at me, she whispered “It’s OK” & turned away from me. But I just had a funny feeling, it wasn’t OK. Not when they would get home. I felt bad for the rest of the day that I might have caused problems for the couple. Poor Timothy called me out just to prove to her that nothing was going on. But how many things does he have to prove? Doesn’t he see nothing he does will make her change her mind?

I told some of my colleagues about this incident which they laughed & made several jokes about it. My male colleagues said Timothy wasn’t a real man to deal with such a woman. Some even went to the extent of saying they could beat her up. While I’d never excuse a man beating up a woman for any reason, I understood that their message was Timothy needed to show her who wears the pants.

Fellas, understand something, real mature women love a manly man. Even the ladies who are strong & independent would need a partner who is stronger & more independent because she knows when she falls, she has a real man to catch her. Do not let a woman, or anyone for that matter, make you forget who you are. Do not mistaken possessiveness to be love. No, she does not love you soooo much she doesn’t want you out of her sight. She is obsessed in having you at the snap of her fingers, bending to her every will. She wants to control you & every aspect of your life. Such a woman will even threaten to leave you if you do not follow what she wants. And like I said before, any relationship run by threats, is one not worth having. A relationship should be full of joyous moments filled with love, trust & faith. A willingness to work together. It should not be one sided.

AB3Image courtesy of Google

I cannot say for sure if Timothy faces any kind of physical abuse at home. All I know for sure is, he must be emotionally exhausted if this is how he lives everyday. I know for a fact emotional abuse is still abuse & I honestly believe he deserves a better woman who is secure of herself & has better to do in her life than want to possess his soul.

But maybe, just maybe, Timothy can stand up to her. Why do I say this? Because after that little confrontation, I never acknowledged her presence whenever I saw her. I’d just pass her by. This happened a few times & each time I felt her eyes watching me. One day, she started to smile & say hi to me. Which was a surprise honestly! I nodded & said hi back. So I understood, shes just a spoiled brat. Give her attention, she takes you like crap. But take away the attention, and she wonders whats going on. Timothy has spoiled her waaaay too much, always bending to her will. What she needs is a hard lesson.

The next time she threatens to leave, Timothy should just let her go. It would be a test to see if she will return & I guarantee, she would. Because she sees that her foolishness would actually cause her to lose him. Fellas, you sometimes need to show your woman that you have a life outside of her. Do not make her the centre of your world. Clinging on to each other is not love. It’s an unhealthy obsession!

ManPrayImage courtesy of Google

Just like women are advised to have a life outside of a relationship, Men are encouraged to do the same. Go hang out with friends, with your family, go make your money, go to the barber. Give yourself the distance to actually miss each other. This life is not a guaranteed one because what will happen to you if the relationship does not work out? Who will you run to?

Fellas, I urge that you recognize the signs of an abusive girlfriend. The signs are obvious but you may too in love that you turn a blind eye to them. If she:

  • Demands to know where you are & what are you doing at all time
  • Does not give you time & space to work or do what you need to
  • Calls at random odd hours, knowing very well you are busy
  • Gets angry when you do not respond to her calls/texts fast enough
  • Shows up at the places you are at unannounced
  • Demands that you do not talk to other women
  • Screams at you when you try to talk to her calmly
  • Beats you a little too hard & acts like it’s a joke
  • Keeps saying you are not man enough or bruises your ego at every chance she gets
  • Asks you to take pictures at every place you tell her you are going
  • Makes you feel like crap about your looks
  • Pouts or makes your life hell when you don’t buy her what she wants
  • Is unsupportive & uncaring about your goals & dreams
  • Is in charge of your accounts & might even demand a joint account
  • You have absolutely no privacy when shes around

There are many signs that would take me ages to type but those are the main ones you will not miss.

Men are being abused by their girlfriends & wives every day. We hardly hear their stories because they believe they will be laughed at for not being manly enough to deal with it. Fellas, such a guy is not weak. Just because the abuse is happening, it does not mean the man is a wimp! He truly believes he has to tolerate all this in the name of love. Often such a guy makes excuses to himself that it’s his fault she is this way. And he makes the mistake of trying to prove to her so much that he loves her, he does not realize he is losing himself.

I believe this topic needs to be discussed more. I’d love to hear more stories from men in such situations & how they got out of it. I know there are a lot worse stories than Timothy’s & I pray to God whenever I think of him. I pray that he gets out of this by growing his self esteem & truly loving himself to see he deserves better treatment. And I also pray for his wife to finally see the error of her ways & improve herself so she can see the good man she has.

Sending you looove ❤

 

 

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Coffee time - My Thoughts

Oh honey, Jealousy is such an ugly color on you!

thumb_001Envy

You enter the office & give your colleagues a chirpy good morning, everyone responds back except..her. She’s always there. Giving you those dreaded elevator looks or whispering to your other co-workers as she glances at you, you just know girlfriend be throwing shade your way.

She is the jealous co-worker. The one who you feel with the fiber of every being, the hatred oozing out of those eyes. The one who cannot tame her green-headed monster when it comes to you. As working women, we have come across such. Sometimes the jealousy starts from the moment they meet you, with others, it just grows with time. Women can be jealous for various reasons but the most common one of all is feeling intimidated by your presence. They feel you are either prettier, smarter,  get more attention from people or really all of the above! Here are a few signs of a jealous co-worker & what you should do if you recognize them in your colleague:

  • She does not greet you back when you say Good Morning
  • She pretends you do not exist
  • Her face changes quickly from a pleasant one to a scowl when she sees you
  • She does not clap or congratulate you on your achievements
  • You have caught her talking shit about you behind your back
  • She purposely hangs around with people that do not like you
  • She never looks you in the eye when you’re talking to her
  • She tries to sabotage your work
  • If she does speak to you, it’s with a rude tone or with a lot of attitude
  • She competes with you – Suddenly changes her dressing style or hair
  • She cannot stand being in the room when people are praising you
  • She makes snide remarks about you
  • She never agrees with any idea you mention in relation to the work you do
  • If she is someone that you do converse with, she makes sure to always criticize SOMETHING about you
  • Your failure is her happiness
  • Your success is her misery

Recognise any of these traits? Then chances are, girlfriend is haaaatin on you! Let me tell you what you can do about it…

NOTHING!

Look, just because someone chooses to hate you because you are fabulous, it is NOT your fault. Do not blame yourself or even feel bad for a minute! Clearly if they see something in you that they are intimidated by, its only cause you’re that amazing! Now, unless you’ve been the kind who brags about their achievements & successes then I’d say that you’ve got it coming. You will find yourself in the middle of a lot of people who want what they think they cant have. Best thing you can do is analyse if that’s the case with the jealous one & instead offer (in a subtle way) to help her climb to the top. Show her that theres no need of feeling competitive, that you’re both there to learn & shine together. However, if she’s really not about shinning with you but wants to take the entire spotlight, that’s a different case.

You could confront her of course & see what’s really up. Do not say something like ‘’I know you’re jealous!’’ No body is ever going to admit to jealousy. But try & see if you can form a friendship with this person by complimenting her or being a little kinder to her. If that fails then there’s really nothing you can do cause her hate is just too deep to allow herself to see the good in you.

Continue being professional with her even if she makes you feel like stapling her hand to her desk or tripping her over. Remember, people are watching silently & they will see who is actin the fool so don’t be the bigger one. Let her be the childish one by not conducting herself professionally.

If she gets abusive in anyway, quietly document everything as well as the date & time of the act. This can help you one day when things go too far. Take your concerns to the HR & they will set things straight. Without proof, it will only be your words against hers.

Spend your time around more friendly colleagues or others you haven’t really gotten to know. Yoou never know, you may find a new friend  instead of worrying about the jealous one that doesn’t have your best interest at heart. Smile more often, joke & laugh with your colleagues more & you’ll find yourself having more friends who will not have a mean word to say about you. Infact, they may even defend you when the jealous one tries to talk ill of you. But even if not, you should carry on smiling that you will always be ahead of them because you are focused on you & your fabulousness!

Honestly, I’ve been in this situation where girlfriend was hatin & for a while I tortured myself by asking what I did. I even tried approaching her to have an adult conversation with her but she chose to ignore me. I realized there was nothing I could do about it & had to let it be. That’s just who she was & no matter how much I’d try to make her see reason, she’d absolutely refuse to & believed she was right in her ways. I just felt bad for her because I knew it wasn’t just about me. It was about herself. She truly had low self-esteem to feel like this not just about me, but almost every woman that walked through the doors. I’ve prayed for her & do hope God heals her of whatever pains her. Sometimes, that’s the only thing you can do for them.

Sending you looooove ❤

 

 

 

 

 

Treasures of Mombasa

Treasures of Mombasa : Kuringa Kollection

kuringa kollection logo

I love, love, LOVE jewellery. You’ll rarely find me without a few pieces on. Especially if they are African beads. There’s something enchanting about the bright colors & a piece of culture that is made perfectly to fit a person. And I’m so glad to find a place that caters to my jewellery obsession!

I present to you Kuringa Kollection a handmade jewellery & bead shop located right here in Mombasa, Old Town!

“Kuringa” means being Prideful , in this context it means have pride in the culture you were born in, pride in being African. And what better way to show that then to gift yourself with these lovely pieces?

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Kuringa Kollection makes the most unique looking bracelets, waist beads, earrings & all kinds of jewellery to make you look & feel amazing. The use of pure brass, glass beads, precious stones are done so creatively to suit your every jewellery need. The best part of this place is that they cater to your needs, so if you have an idea in mind & want it custom made, you can have it done for you right there & then! It won’t take much time cause they have all the necessary beads & items to get it made. The only reason anything would take time is because you absolutely cannot decide between the varieties of beads & trinkets you’d want to mix! Yup! They have A LOT of options for you to choose from!

IMG_20190715_160449An example of lovely beads to pick. There are lots of others too!
IMG_20190714_225132I’m already thinking how cute these would look as charms on a bracelet!

And the best part of it all? It’s so affordable! It’s almost impossible to walk out of there with just one piece. Don’t believe me? Visit them yourself, you’ll understand what I mean.

IMG-20190715-WA0024Tiger-eye beads
IMG-20190715-WA00237 chakras bracelet

And yes, fellas! Theres something for you as well! Check out some of these unique pieces.

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Amazing, right???

Of course I do feel the need to show off some of the pieces I got. 🙂

IMG_20190717_185133.jpgI adore this necklace. I get the option wearing it loose like this
IMG_20190717_185215Or as a choker like this
IMG_20190717_184030.jpgI’m loving these light yet stylish earrings!

So where do we find Kuringa Kollection? They are at Digo Road, Baroda shopping mall, opposite Fairdeal furniture Stall Number 15.

Another great thing is the people who live out of Mombasa don’t have to feel left out. They deliver the pieces you want to you whether you are in Kenya or even abroad. Have a look at their Instagram page for more pictures : https://www.instagram.com/kuringakollection/

You can also contact them on: 072852772/0722981453 to get more information.

I hope you guys enjoyed this post as much as I enjoyed making it.

Sending you looooove! ❤

 

Coffee time - My Thoughts

Passion to Action : The event that was worthwhile

imageImage courtesy of Google

In the last few years, I’ve been questioning a lot of things about my life. Some of those things I’ve figured out in terms of who I’am (thanks to meditation & self affirmations) & other things, I’m still yet to find out.

One of those things I’d like to talk about now is my career path. I admit that as proud as it makes me to see women my age or younger doing their thing successfully, I feel a little sad that I’m not even sure what I should be doing. I look at them & see how they have their lives figured out, waking up in the mornings with a burst of energy, ready to do what they were born to do with so much love for it. While I’m still here, at my desk, looking at the reports I have to do as I wonder if there is more to life than this.

Don’t get me wrong, I like my job. I’m working in one of the best & well known ICT companies in Mombasa. And recently, I’ve been promoted as a Sales Executive. That’s a step up to where I was, so it’s great! But while it seems like my career path is going in the right direction, I still don’t feel…happy. I’ve reached a point where an 8-5 life is not for me anymore. It felt like I was just slaving away & making someone else’s dream come true. But what about me?

Enter Cess. Cess, the founder of WIN (Women Icon Network), posts up a Meet & Greet Networking Event ad on a Whatsapp group & it really piqued my interest! It’s theme read “Passion to Action”  a topic to be addressed by a speaker called Sheila Toya,  an amazing Life transformation couch. She was going to give a speech about how one could turn their passions into business. What great timing! I just had to go for this!

So on 8th of June, accompanied by my good friend Amina, we attended the event & met so many friendly women who introduced themselves to us, it really made us feel right at home. I knew from the moment I entered the place, I was going to enjoy being there.

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We watched as women introduced themselves, tell us their stories on how they’ve been through heartbreaking situations, how they overcame the toughest times sometimes with their loved ones & other times all alone. How they saw an opportunity in those situations to start something to either impact the community in small or big ways. It was inspirational to hear about their victories & losses. All these women  had one common trait: They were Risk Takers. And if they didn’t take risks, they wouldn’t have reached the great heights of successes that they did.

One of the things Sheila emphasized on was how the journey of Self-Identity is the most important thing a person must do in order to achieve success.

IMG_20190617_115225.jpgThe wonderful Sheila Toya

If you don’t know yourself or aren’t confident in your capabilities,  how will you succeed in anything? How will you expect anyone to even believe in you if you cannot believe in yourself? In this world, we cannot do things all on our own. I don’t believe we’re really meant to. I believe people are put in our path to help us reach where we want to. It’s really important to recognize who are the ones that are actually good for us.

And even if you come across people who do you wrong, its necessary to learn what they came to teach you. Experiences whether good or bad simply helps you grow.

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Sheila’s talk was something I needed to hear & it made me realize that your passion should be what you love doing, what gives you that glowing feeling of excitement, what makes you feel energized & not drained. Something you wouldn’t mind doing for free simply cause it gives you joy. Because once you discover it, the money will automatically come. You don’t have to worry about how because eventually you will discover the answer. Just do what makes you feel happy.

After all, I believe our purpose in this world is to be happy.

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When the speech ended, it was time to network with the beauties there. I met 2 amazing women. One is a fashion designer, Nancy Nthambi, who runs a fashion company called Heights of Glamour, that makes African theme berets, handbags, clutch purses & oh so much more! She introduced a few berets that looked absolutely beautiful! But not only do they look good, they are made with satin fabric that protect the hair while looking stylish. Wowie!

IMG-20190614-WA0030.jpgNancy looking amazing while rocking her signature African Beret!
IMG-20190614-WA0015.jpgI’d love to rock this bag!
IMG-20190614-WA0020.jpgTrès chic!

I took her card & had to look through her social media to see what else she had. I can say I’m really impressed by what this young lady has to offer to the world & I’d love to see her go far. You can check her out here on: https://www.facebook.com/Heights-of-Glamour-197231087743555/ & https://www.instagram.com/heightsofglamour/. Also for more information on how you can order her lovely things do contact her on : 0704355499

Then I met Emily Carter of Cakes & Caterers.

IMG-20190615-WA0013.jpgThe Glamourous Emily!

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She makes customized cakes & catering for birthdays, anniversaries…all occasions! Her cakes are soooo yummy! She passed some samples of a marble cake at the event & I enjoyed every morsel of it! Check her out here: https://www.instagram.com/emmyscakeshouse/ & https://www.facebook.com/EmmyB001/. Also contact her for orders on : 0720117017 / 0780117017

I had a really good time at the event & I’m so grateful to Cess for inviting me. She was a really great host & I’d love to attend more of any events she has coming up.

IMG_20190615_100119.jpgThe beautiful Cess

While I can’t say I figured everything out immediately, I can say I’ve walked out of there with a wealth of information to help me as I go on this journey of self discovery. I have a lot of interests & a lot of passions, I discovered it’s not just one thing. It doesn’t have to be ONLY one thing. I can have many things I’m passionate about & that’s totally fine. Some people know it from the day their born, others find out at a much later stage in life. There is no right or wrong timing. Just trust in the process & enjoy it along the way. I know I fully intend to. 🙂

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Sending you looove ❤

 

Treasures of Mombasa

What my 4c hair likes : Salummy Hair Products

o+cImage courtesy of Salummy hair product page

One thing in my hair journey of achieving healthy, shiny hair is the constant use of natural products. Some, my own DIY, others I get to experiment with along the way. My hair, Kiki, loves natural things & shes always her most well behaved self when I introduce them to her. So you can imagine my delight when I came across the Instagram page of Salummy Hair Products.

Would you like to wake up one morning with full, healthy hair that doesn’t know what breakage or shedding is like? How about that one morning where you can comb it & not have the fear of watching split ends or hair fall? Or even that one morning where you notice..oh whats that? Hair length!

That’s exactly what Salummy’s hair oil does for you.

oImage courtesy of Salummy hair product page

Main ingredients in this oil are Lavender oil & Ayurvedic. Lavender is an essential oil I always rave about cause it does help in growth & health of hair. And Ayurveda is a type of medicine that’s been used in India for many, many years. Now I’ll be honest, I used to shy away from anything with Ayurvedic in because it has quite a strong scent but after doing my research, I read that this was a type of medicine Indians have been using for hundreds of years. Clearly it must be good because we’ve seen the beautiful, long, healthy hair our Indian sisters have. So I thought, why not?

I decided to try the oil & a week later, I have absolutely NO regrets about my purchase. I normally give a product 3 months to see positive results so I was really surprised when Salummy’s hair oil did wonders for me in a week! On my first day, I applied the oil & noticed how fast it sunk in which is Kiki’s approval for how good it is. When Kiki doesn’t like a hair oil, it normally just sits on top of the hair until its rubbed in a few times. It’s actually doing its work of fixing your hair of any heat damage, giving it moisture & more life & is reducing any hair fall issues you may be facing.

This oil can be used as a hair treatment once a week or simply as a daily hair oil. Maybe treat yourself to a nice head massage to improve the blood circulation. Good thing about the oil is that you don’t have to use too much, very little goes a long way.

I didn’t just buy the oil alone by the way. I also saw the Salummy’s Lavender hair butter & was curious about it. I saw the ingredients & smiled to myself, I even felt Kiki smile! It had Jojoba, Argan & Shea Butter listed in its ingredients. All of these are pure magic for a black woman’s hair. Especially if its Type 4 hair category. Each & every one of those is pretty powerful on its own, Jojaba being light & moisturing. Argan has vitamin E & helps restore shine to hair. And shea butter, oh gosh the shea butter, is my absolute favorite because it does not leave the hair greasy at all. Now imagine all this goodness combined in one jar? Pure Magic!

cImage courtesy of Salummy hair product page

These products can be used on any hair type by the way. Natural vs Relaxed? It does not discriminate lol! It’s on both teams! Women with relaxed hair can use the butter & then seal in the moisture with the oil, you too will experience all the goodness these products have to offer.

The butter promises to also moisturize the hair & make it grow faster. I used this butter with the oil combined & it gave me the fantastic results in a short time. So how did I do it?

opencImage courtesy of Salummy hair product page

I did the LOC method. Ya’ll know the LOC method right? Liquid (Water or Leave in), Oil & Cream. You comb your hair while damp then seal in any oil & any cream you like. After that, you can braid or twist your hair, pin them back until your ready to take them out. In this case, I used the Salummy’s hair oil & replaced cream with Salummy’s Lavender Butter. I twisted my hair & pinned them for the night.

The next morning, I noticed my curls really did pop once I unraveled my twists. I did not even lose a lot of hair when doing so! With the combination of these two products I find the results incredible & long lasting. Kiki stayed shiny, bouncy & looked very healthy for days after!

shineo.jpgSee shine oooo! 😀

Your hair is your crown of glory, give it the royalty it deserves with Salummy’s Hair Products.

meoHappy customer!

Salummy’s Lavender Butter & Hair growth oil are very are available on order. The oil goes for only KSHS 350/- & the butter for KSHS 800/-Quality at an affordable price. How awesome is that?!

lipImage courtesy of Salummy hair product page

Kindly contact Ms. Salummy on : 0705586076 Also visit her Instagram page: https://www.instagram.com/salummy_beauty_products/

And Facebook page:  https://www.facebook.com/SalummysBeautyProducts/ for more products & offers.

Also for those living out of the Coast, don’t feel left out on this goodness! You can still get them at the following places:

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Sending you loooove ❤

 

Treasures of Mombasa

Product review: Jauz Misk Body Lotion

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How would you like to be treated to soft, moisturized & lovely scented skin? The silky skin you absolutely enjoy watching it glow under the light & just can’t help but touch over & over again just to feel the smoothness? I felt exactly that way when I discovered a product that fulfilled my desire of achieving beautiful skin.

Let me introduce you to Jauz Misk Body Lotion. Its defined as Royalty which I find most fitting as it does give you that feeling of being one. Now I’m a sucker for good scented lotions, if I like it, I buy it regardless of price so the moment I flipped the lid open, I was enchanted! The arabic fragrance of Oud (agarwood) overtook my senses.  I’ve used Body lotions with oud before but this one was different. It did not have an overpowering scent that made your head spin like most of the others, oh no! This one was just so unique. I had to get it!

When I applied it, I noticed it easily absorbed into my skin & it did not give me any greasy feeling. I tell you, this lotion is so moisturizing, I’m even pausing from typing this just cause I’m constantly feeling my arms. I can’t help it! They’re just soooo soft!

hand.jpgNo greasy feel!

Great thing about this product is it uses natural products such as pure Coconut oil & Shea butter – A great combination of these two as they heal & are nourishing for all skin types & it also has Vitamin C & E which is essential for skin health.

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Another thing I noticed about Jauz Misk lotion is that, true to its word, it is indeed long lasting. The applied it at night & by next morning I thought the benefits would fade away. Gosh was I wrong! My skin still felt so smooth & supple. Plus I still smelled amazing! I think I can safely say I’m in love with this product. Heh!

For those of you with dry skin, I’d highly recommend you use this immediately after you come out of the shower (do not towel dry!) to ensure you are able to retain moisture & enjoy the benefits.

Jauz body lotions actually come in 2 different types. I’ve tried the Misk one for now but I will definitely get the Modesty one & give it a try.

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So how do you get this piece of heaven in a bottle? It’s available on order if you contact the sales & customer service on: +254780792266. You can also check out their Facebook page for more on what they offer : https://www.facebook.com/Khaleej-General-Processors-2043250525908512/  

Best part? It’s so affordable!!

I hope you beauties enjoyed my post on this & do hope you give this product a try. Let me know once you do & what you think of it, I’d love to know! I’m pretty sure you’ll fall in love with it. I know I have. 🙂

Sending you loooove ❤

 

Coffee time - For the Ladies

For the Ladies: Are you settling for him?

Worried Bride

Image courtesy of Google

My beauties. You have reached that point in your life where you know you’re ready to take your relationships to the next level. You have found the Love of your life & just cannot wait to start your life with him. Best part? He feels the same way & has proposed to you! How great is that!

You’re starry eyed thinking about your wedding day, what kind of a venue it’d be at? The flowers you’d have, the color theme, the food. The people you’d invite, how excited your family & friends will be. Your wedding dress, your hair, your makeup…all that exciting stuff. It’s only normal to have these thoughts rush through the moment your man is down on one knee. Hell, you probably didn’t even hear what he said!

But before you say I do. There are some things you need to seriously question. Marriage is a beautiful thing. It’s meant to be with a partner who will help make it a beautiful, one who is willing to put in the work it takes. So how do you know if the man who has asked for your hand is The One?

Here are some questions to ask yourself:

  • Do you love him?

You’re probably rolling your eyes at that one & thinking “Er…yeah Twali. What kind of a question is that?!”

Ok. But do you love HIM? Can you honestly say you love every single thing about him? We’re human beings, we are not perfect. We have imperfections that we can either fix or just have to deal with it. Can you deal with his imperfections? I’m not talking about the little stuff like he forgets things easily or he loves to eat strange smelly dishes that makes your nose react funny. I’m talking about things like being a pessimist all the time or not keeping his word. Things you know deep down you can never tolerate & it drives you crazy. If you have an honest conversation with him & he does change for the better, then your relationship is in a good place. But if he doesn’t even try to make a change & constantly argues with you. Then perhaps you need to rethink your decision.

  • Why are you really marrying him?

If you’re marrying him because of factors like Age, Family pressure or Society naysayers…then you aren’t doing it for the right reasons. Look, people will always have something to say about you, whether you are married or unmarried. You will never be able to stop that. Do not live your life based on how others feel is right for you. Think about it, those people will be there to celebrate your wedding but nobody will be there to fix any issues that will occur in your marriage. Your real reasons for marrying him should be because you love, trust & respect him. It’s better to wait long then marry wrong.

  • Does he support your dreams?

There is nothing better than to have someone who would be there to cheer you on when you achieve your every goal in life. Does your man support what you do/want to do in life? I believe this conversation should happen early on to avoid any surprises. I have seen women who get married only to later be told by the hubby she should stop working. If your dream is to be taken care of by a man willing to do that, then this would be a come true for you. However, if you are goal driven, such a case would be a nightmare! Make sure the man you’re with believes in all you want to aspire & is willing to work with you to make them happen.

  • Does he respect you?

If your man has a habit of criticizing you & masking that as a joke. He does not respect you. A man who truly adores you will never make you feel bad in any way. He will always make you feel like a Queen that you are, in good days or bad. If you find yourself always making the calls & texting to keep the communication going but he doesn’t do as much, He does not respect you. A man who truly adores you will know to keep in touch often without you having to beg for his attention. Identify what is disrespect & what is something that can be worked on. If he tries to change then he’s listening & wants to do better. If not, well…you know best. Do not make excuses for disrespectful behavior.

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  • Do you respect him?

When he tells you about his dream, do you see yourself beliving in them or do you secretly scoff & think “Psh! That will never work!”

When he opens up to you about something in his heart, do you listen & care on what he says or do you find yourself zoning out, thinking of the next show to watch cause its more interesting than this guy? Respect goes both ways, and it’s a free thing to be given. And if it doesn’t exist on your side, honey, let him go so he can find someone who can give it to him.

  • Are you with him because you feel no one can love you better?

Well, are you? Because that’s a real flawed way of thinking. At this point, it isn’t really about him. It’s about you. If you truly believe that life can only give you 50% of what you want, then that’s exactly what you will receive. Do not make this mistake. You will forever torture yourself wondering if there was more out there for you. Give yourself that chance to be absolutely sure. You deserve to be 100% happy.

  • Are you sacrificing who you are?

If you’ve changed the way you look or dress, keep silent when you were once very opinionated, let go of that job opportunity, given up on anything that mattered to you just because HE said so. Then you have sacrificed who you are & what you are all about. Love is free, it is unconditional & it is acceptance. If you’ve changed everything about yourself, then you are allowing this person to control you. Soon, such a person will control every aspect of your life until you no longer know who you are. A man has to love you for who you are, your good, your bad, your ugly. If you cannot be your true self around him then you will become who he wants you to be. Do you think that’s fair to you?

  • That nagging voice inside

The biggest red flag of all is the voice inside you that tells you “This is not right”. We often choose not to listen to this voice yet it speaks from the very first day we see something that isn’t right in the other person. We just cover it up with excuses & even tell ourselves we’re being too paranoid or unreasonable. Understand, that nagging voice will always be there & will only get louder as time passes. You have a choice to either confront it now & ask why, really see the answers for yourself. Or you can choice to ignore it & later deal with whatever consequences you face.

When it comes to getting married, the choice you make should not be taken lightly. Do not get married because you’re lonely & tired of being single. Do not get married because everyone else is doing so & you don’t want to be left out.

Get married because you know you’re ready, you know the person you’re with is special to you, is supportive of you, treats you amazingly & wants to make it work with you. Get married because you’ve found the one who really understands, cherishes & loves you for you. And you feel the exact same way about him. Get married because you’ve found your Best Friend. The person who knows you better than most, the one who you’ll have great conversations with & can’t wait to explore the world together.

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To those who are getting married this year. I wish you all the joy in the world. And to those who want to & are still looking, I wish you find what you’re looking for & find happiness along with him. Amin.

 

Sending you loooooove ❤